can't vs. can

There are a plethora of things I can't do... some are for want of trying, while others are simply because I am not qualified by some requirement other than sheer skill. For instance: anything where the pre-requisite is being a man, or being under 5 feet 6 inches, or over 6 feet, or a different ethnicity, or older than a certain age, or younger than a certain age, or ambidextrous, or able to sing the alphabet backwards... I need not apply. And really, none of these things bother me. Except for one.

Last month I was confronted with a ministry opportunity that I was "disqualified" for because I am single. This event catapulted my mind into a lot of reflection. I'm pretty creative, so the more I thought about it, the more extensive my list of "things I can't do because I'm single" grew. Before I realized it, my joy was slowly ebbing away and I started feeling resentful that God would give me gifts and then keep me from using them because of my relational status.

Well. Not long after that, I was able to have some quality sit-still-and-be-quiet time with God at the ECB women's weekend prayer retreat. During that time, God surfaced that the way I had been identifying myself and viewing ministry was in the context of "can't" and "am not": What can't I do? What am I missing? What gifts am I not using how I would like? And He, in His patient graciousness, reminded me of who I am: chosen, called, forgiven, righteous, loved, redeemed, adopted, and sanctified. He also reminded me of the ministries I can be involved with, capacities I can and am serving in, and what singular opportunities He has been able to give me because of my singleness.

He also showed me that this is not a struggle that will end upon getting married. Every person, at every stage of life, has something that, in their eyes, "disqualifies" them from serving either in a way or capacity that they would like. There are parents who want to be more involved in church, but the needs of their young children limit them. Older people who are limited by their health. Younger people limited by their lack of experience. Everyone could come up with some reason why they can't do something, but we also have a choice. We can believe what we feel to be truth, or we can believe what God has revealed to be Truth. That He is sovereign. That He has a purpose. That He is good. That He is for our obedience. To dwell on anything other than this is to follow in the footsteps of Eve, who focused on what was witheld, rather than the abundance which had already been given.

No matter where I am, or what season I am in, God has given me a sphere of influence in which to do ministry. I want to choose to actively recognize what He has given me and how I can use my gifts within the context I'm currently in. Why? Because there is great joy in living and serving within the boundaries He has placed in our lives.

Where you are now is not where you'll be forever. Where you can serve now, is not where you'll be able to serve forever. God operates in seasons. I think the key is learning to maximize and value the season you are in. When this season passes and God opens different doors to serve, love that season, too.